In couples counseling, it is a false assumption that the counselor acts as a mediator for arguments. In truth, the counselor is focused on the relationship and interactions, not individual issues or arguments by helping to assist you in finding a pathway to communication and ease both of you into the relationship that best fits your life.
Treatment modalities for Couples Therapy:
Gottman Method - Interventions are designed to help couples strengthen their relationships in three primary areas: friendship, conflict management, and the creation of shared meaning. Couples learn to replace negative conflict patterns with positive interactions and to repair past hurts. Interventions designed to increase closeness and intimacy are used to improve friendship, deepen emotional connection, and create changes that enhance the couples shared goals.
Discernment Therapy - A Discernment Counselor creates a holding environment when one person is leaning out of the marriage and nearing a final decision to divorce, and the other person is leaning in and ready to do whatever it takes to save the marriage. Even among couples who have filed for divorce, as many as 40% are mixed agenda. Providing the opportunity for couples to understand each other and decide on a direction for their marriage, whether that is divorce or one last try to make it work is the process of counseling. Discernment Therapy a short term, intensive process lasting 1-5 sessions.
Communication skills - learn ways to disarm conflicting verbal communication, increase intimacy, respect, and affection, remove barriers that create a feeling of stagnancy in conflicting situations, and create a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the context of the relationship.